Independence

It’s been a big summer for Rowenna.

When school ended for the year, we took down all the gates in the house. I was tired of stepping over them and Rowenna had developed a series of techniques for breaking through them. (Including using her baby carriage to crash through, which, while frustrating was also kind of funny and rather clever.) We secured a few things (a door leading to a somewhat precarious set of stairs to the basement, the cabinet with all of our cleaning supplies) but otherwise let cabinets and things be.

Then braced ourselves for piles of pots and pans scattered in the kitchen and flour dumped all over the place.

But it didn’t happen. She was ready for this freedom. Sure, she poked around in some cabinets, but on the whole she just enjoyed the freedom of movement in her own house. Instead of watching us cook from the other side of the gate, she can come right into the kitchen and stand near us or help. She likes to bring things to do into the kitchen – a chair to sit in and “supervise,” food from her play kitchen. She also likes to watch things baking in the oven. (Me, too!)

Making cupcakes – placing liners.

Rowenna spent quite a bit of time at first just going up and down the stairs. We have a neat stair case that splits in two at the first landing – one way goes into the living room, one way goes into the kitchen. This was a revelation which required much exploring and resulted in a lot of delighted shrieks when she would come down the kitchen side and find her dad. When that stopped being exciting, she spent a lot of time exploring the second story. We don’t spend a lot of time up there so it never really occurred to me that she might be so curious about what all these rooms were for. (Obviously I didn’t really think that through.) As with the kitchen, with time she stopped randomly exploring and has been much more purposeful in her play upstairs.

Once things settled after The Great Gate Removal, we converted her crib into a toddler bed. That was a fantastic day in our house. She was enthralled at the ability to get into and out of her bed all on her own. She’s even been known to put herself down for a nap. I’ve had a few interesting interactions with her since the toddler bed conversion in which she was frustrated I wouldn’t let her do something so she stomped off to her room, shut the door, and flung herself onto her bed, teenager style. (I know, I know – I laugh now, but it won’t be cute for long.)

Proud to be in her big girl bed!

Rowenna seems to have suddenly become a big girl over the summer. She brings a book into her bed and looks through it, she confidently navigates through all the rooms of the house and up and down stairs. The pride is evident on her face as she does these things. She knows she is a big girl.

Having seen these changes in Rowenna, I am forced to sit back and consider in what ways we may have been unintentionally limiting her. Obviously the gates were a physical barrier, and intentional, but were there unintended consequences? I have to wonder because we have seen an explosion in both signing and non-verbal cues since the day we took the gates down. With access to the front door and our shoes, she indicates her desire to go for a walk by signing “walk,” handing hubby his shoes, then impatiently waiting for him instead of crying and tugging on hubby’s leg. When she is hungry, she goes into the kitchen, rummaging in cabinets or pointing to the fridge, and pulling out a plate. Open the fridge and she will make her own selection, instead of crying when we offer the “wrong” food. When she wants her kiddie pool, she pulls a towel over to the back door and waits. And on and on. Dozens of small interactions each day, every day, showing us just how big her world is, and how much she truly wants to tell us.  She has shown us that she understands all the pieces of the puzzle, so to speak, all the steps that go into going for a walk, eating a meal, going to the store.

We have always signed with her, have always named things for her. But now we are better able to tailor our discussions with her because it so much more apparent what she wants to tell us. We are assuming less, and communicating more. I am hopeful that this will help her vocabulary grow, and we’ve already seen evidence of it this summer. Just in the last few weeks she’s showing a renewed interest in her signing videos and is trying more signs than ever before. She is also bringing back signs we haven’t seen in a while. (Rowenna has a tendency to learn a sign, use it consistently and accurately and then…nothing. She stops using it.)

We’ve also been reminded that Rowenna learns so much by doing, and at this time seems to rely heavily on contextual clues to communicate with us. This is important information I will bring to her teachers this fall as we all work together to help Rowenna at school. Big things are coming for my girl, I can feel it. This is going to be a great year.

Enjoying a little breakfast at grandma’s and grandpa’s house.